Death By Chick-Lit

I’ve realized that 60% of the books I read in a month are classified as chick-lit. Even the ones that have main characters as guys. If you’re culturally retarded, I’m not talking about the soft-core porn novels with titles like forbidden fruit and pink covers. I’m talking about stuff like The Nanny Diaries, and yes … Death by Chick-Lit. If you don’t remember, I’m a straight male.

I don’t remember what Point I was trying to make with this post.

Postworthy (.Com)

So, recently I’ve been getting up to 50 or 60 hits a day. Most of them come from the WordPress tag Postworthy or Postworthy.com. Honestly I have no idea what it is, or why I got on there. All I know is that I made an entry, after I was featured on there for like a minute. If you want to help me solve the mystery of Postworthy, share your info!

Hellomotorolasan

Today, I’m running and then all of a sudden this old guy starts running behind me . I’m like what the fuck?  I don’t know if he was running before  and  I didn’t notice him , or he wants to tell me something, or he wants to kidnap me and read me bedtime stories. So I decide to make a loop and see if he follows me, he does, and I’m kinda weirded out, so I got on to the main road, and headed to the 7-11 attached to the Gas Station. It’s broad daylight so I’m not really worried, but the guy is still following me. I turn around just to look, and he’s gone. When I make the trip back home, I see him on the ground looking under a car, trying to coax something out. It was a cat. Then I realized there was a cat following me the whole time. HOW DID I NOT NOTICE THAT BEFORE. I think I’m going crazy.

arghhh

So everyday I’ve been getting up and that small feeling of dread comes over me. That feeling I haven’t had since May. I have to feed my neighbors hamster for the next week , right? No problem, just unlock the door go feed the hamster, play with it, lock up and go home. Takes about …. 6 minutes tops.

Well.

The neighbors haven’t completley left yet. Their two oldest sons (who are nice) are always there, one of them is a delinquent, the other graduated from a top college. The delinquent I’m pretty sure is not supposed to be there, he moved across town. So now I go over there, have to knock and feed a hamster, while they’re there, and it’s not like they disappear upstairs and tell me to let myself out. They’re always in the room next door, with two other wasted guys on the couch, and it’s like WHY ARE YOU HERE. YOU’RE GROWN UP AND BOTH OWN YOUR OWN APARTMENTS, LEAVE SO I CAN FEED THE HAMSTER WITHOUT BEING SELF CONSCIOUS AND WEIRD. See, the other thing is I have to play with the  hamster. I can’t just feed it and leave, so it takes 10 minutes to get the thing into a ball so it can run around, and just my luck it runs straight to the living room right towards the wasted guy on the floor. Needless to say, I completely ignore that part of my “job” now. Get in feed the hamster, if they tell they’re parents I ignored half the things I was supposed to do. Fuck it, I don’t care. I’m extremely self-conscious and I can’t get rid of that part of me till I actually do, which will be in a year or two. Trust me, I know.